In destiny's hand
by Fears Unspoken
Summary: Everyone knows the tragic story of the kannazuki priestesses, but what if Himeko was the one who recovered her memories instead of Chikane? What would she do? Would it change anything? Rating undecided. Past life flashbacks and love insured. Sort of AU
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Beware! The story you are about to read is most likely going to be at least 50% AU. It's been too long since I've seen the series and I have neither the time or the energy to watch it all again. So it's suppose to follow the same time line of the story and follow with similar, if not the same, events that took place in KnM...I just forgot what events those were, so I'm making it up. Those I might remember will mostly be out of order anyway. As For the Chan- and San-, you know the whole Japanese suffixes thing. I'm not doing it. I'm English and I'm too lazy to look up the suffixes myself every time I use someone's name. Instead, Mr., Mrs. and Ms. will be used in it's place. So Ms. Himemiya means I'm referring to Chikane. Mrs. Himemiya is her mother (who will appear briefly). Reminder: Review and favs = more chapters. Just keep that in mind. *Ahem* Without farther ado, Chapter one. (EDIT 8/3/10: This chapter has been proofed)

In destiny's hand

A kannazuki no miko fic

Makoto Saotome groaned slightly before moving to roll over, only to find that she couldn't. She opened her eyes a little in hopes to see what was holding her in place but then immediately shut them. The sun had found the perfect crack between the curtains to peek through, the one that made it shine directly into her eye. Groaning again, she waited for her vision to adjust while at the same time attempting to shuffle around the curtains to fill in the crack.

It brought her back to her first problem, not being able to move very well. Finally getting around to looking down at her feet, Makoto realized she wasn't in her dorm room as she had first thought. Staring at the cast around her leg, it took her a minute to remember the events that took place earlier that week.

'Oh that's right.' Makoto thought as her sleep numbed brain finally came up to speed. 'My leg's broken.'

This hadn't been the first day she woke up in the hospital with no recollection of how she got there. In fact, that just about sums up every morning she's had since she was injured. Eh, what could she said? Pain killers don't make very good morning people.

She sighed to herself. 'Oh yay. Another morning waiting in the dark until the nurse comes in to open the curtains for me and then I can spend the rest of the day staring aimlessly out the window wishing I had something better to do then continuously counting the ceiling tiles or bash my head in with the panic button. Huh, maybe the nurse will up my dose of morphine and make the day run smoother.'

It was enough to make a girl start smoking. Admittedly, Makoto would never do anything to ruin her lungs in such a way but it did sound pretty tempting right now.

Her amber eyes scanned the room until they spotted the T.V. in the far corner. It was broken when she arrived. Apparently, the patient that was here before her had a fit and they had yet to repair it. She was certain her torment wouldn't have been this agonizing if she had something to do. God, this was all that...that thing's fault! Whatever it was. Damn thing dropped out of nowhere and started destroying stuff for no apparent reason, then disappeared without a trace. And to make matters worse, the small glimpse she got of it before she was knock on conscious made her think that it was some kind of…robot. Just the very thought of a giant robot destroying the girl's dorm made her want to beat the nearest nerd she could find with her crutches, not to mention it set her lame-reflex off and made her want to gag.

While Makoto was trying to figure out what to do next, contemplating if it was really worth it to bother her nurse (that woman was the grouchiest morning person she's ever met), she slowly began to realize that she wasn't the only person in the room. Perhaps it was out of habit that she checked the chair by her bed each time she woke up, waiting for someone to come and visit though she did run off the only person she really wanted to see. Perhaps today some heavenly force took pity on her and granted a window of opportunity in her miserable state or, maybe they thought she had suffered enough. Whatever the reason, when she looked this time, there was someone actually there.

Whether it was the darkness of the room or Makoto's own disbelief, she propped herself up on her elbows as best as she could to get a better view of her visitor who lookeimpeccablylfamiliarar. She was almost afraid to call out to them, afraid it just might be a drug induced illusion to mess with her already plagued mind. But hey, an illusion is better then nothing.

"Himeko?"

At first, her friend didn't speak. She just sat there, which was very unsettling for the ex-track star. 'Correction!' The injured brunette thought. 'I'm only temporarily retired. My track career isn't over yet. Not by a long shot. This is only a um…minor setback.'

Out of the darkness, Makoto could just barely make out the little twitch Himeko's mouth made. The kind of twitch you get when you try to smile but just can't, or when you have something to say but don't know how to say it.

The brunette waited as patiently as she could, knowing that rushing Himeko would only push her farther from speaking. After what seemed like an eternity, the normally carefree girl finally spoke but if possible, it made Makoto worry even more.

"H-hey Makoto… I'm…I'm sorry if I woke you. I, um, know you asked me not to come around here. I just…I'll leave in a minute." Her voice cracked, and faded as she spoke, making it very hard to understand. She sounded awful.

Himeko's appearance wasn't any better. Her beautiful oddly colored eyes that usually shined with such joy were now dull, tired and puffy with her usual glowing completion as white as the paint on the walls behind her. It looked as if she'd been crying but there were no evident of tears of any kind on her face. Oh man, even her cute little bow was in disarray. It sat there all floppy and crooked. Now that the brunette was looking at it, she was pretty sure it was just upside down all together. It was like the saddened girl just woke up and threw everything on without a single care about how she un-Himeko like. She was just so... fragile looking. If it wasn't for her cast, Makoto might have gotten out of bed to pull her into her arms just to tell her everything was going to be all right. But since that wasn't an option right now, she tried to do the next best thing. Apologizing like hell.

"Whoa whoa girl, hold your horses. You don't have to leave. Now look, you know as much as I do that I can be an ass sometimes. I…I was just upset before. I mean, I was in a lot of pain and the doctors kept talking about how I might not be able to be in track again. Ever! And it was all very upsetting and I took it out on you and I felt horrible for it afterwards and I…I just… didn't want you to see me this way." The injured track star looked away now that she relieved the real reason for the way she acted towards her friend. Not only to Himeko but to herself as well.

It made her feel kind of …shallow. Was that the right word for it? The way she had so carelessly let her emotions get the better of her and it not only made her seem like a jerk but it also hurt one of her closest friends. And for what, just to be able to pout alone? Whatever happened to misery loves company. Oh wait…

"Look Himeko. I want you to know that I'm sorry and that I don't blame you for any of this. None of it. Not a single bit. I just need to vent and…you know, do the teenage drama thing."

Makoto was afraid she wasn't getting through to the girl when Himeko didn't respond right away. She was just about to get down to the floor on her knees and beg her friend not to take it so personally, when her roommate began to speak. Thank goodness she did too; it would have been painful as hell to get out of that bed in her condition.

Her friend smiled weakly and pushed back her hair a bit. "Thank you, Makoto. You have no idea how much better that makes me feel."

To Makoto it didn't look like much at all but hell, she was getting somewhere.

"Well, thank god that's over with now that I know you're not angry with me. Sooooo…who spit in your coffee this morning?"

Himeko gave a little 'Ha' at that one. 'Yes! Another point for Makoto.' She was just racking them up today.

Her friend just shook her head. "Nobody in particular. I just…messed up. Boy, is that the understatement of the year." She looked as if she was going to cry, possible not for the first time today.

The brunette waited silently for her to continue. It must have been something serious if she was beating herself up this badly over it.

The rather saddened Himeko then took a deep breath and leaned her head back against the wall, staring at the ceiling instead of the injured athlete as she continued. "Makoto….do you believe in destiny?"

"What do you mean?" she asked with alsincerityty, letting Himeko know that she wouldn't laugh at her this time or crack jokes.

"I mean…like you were destined to do something, that no matter how many times you go through it, the resolute always seems the same. That there was nothing you could do to change it. It just repeats itself, over and over and over again, a never ending cycle of…failure." her voice grew softer and softer, making the last of her sentence hard to catch.

"You want my honest opinion?"

Himeko nodded.

"I believe it's a bunch of bullshit."

The blonde slowly turned her head to look at her.

There was more to that motion then meets the eye. Now Makoto didn't curse very often and when she did, she was either very serious or very angry. And since steam wasn't pouring out of her ears, Himeko decided to go with the first option. It was touching that her goof ball of a friend would go to such a level of uncharacteristic seriousness just to let her know she was there for her. She would have said something about it but Makoto continued on.

"I mean, yes. I do believe that there are certain things we are meant to do in our lives but it says nothing about how we're suppose to do it. Like if this "destiny" is something that continually repeating itself and it keeps coming out the same way, then maybe that's because that person keeps doing the same thing."

Himeko blinked. "How can you know?"

"People say all the time that history is destined to repeat itself and as my history teacher has pounded into my head all year, 'We're here to know the past so that we can learn from it and not make the same mistakes again. '" Makoto went as far as to held up her pointer finger and plugged her nose in order to mimic her teacher just right, making Himeko giggle, possibly the first real smile she's had all day.

She smiled at her and continued. "If you want something to change, you have to do something differently then you had before. There are just too many possibilities, too many choices in this world for anything to be unavoidable, or at least that's what I believe."

They sat in silence for a while, soaking in the amazingly wise and oddly appropriate answer Makoto just gave. Both equally surprised at how right it sounded despite who said it.

The injured track star just hoped her luck in this conversation was still with her as she addressed the next problem.

"Himeko" She paused for a moment. "I'm not going to sit here and pretend I know what you're going through or what even caused it but I have the feeling this isn't something you want to talk about. At least not with me anyway."

Himeko's apologetic smile confirmed it.

Makoto just smirked half-heartedly. "Figures since you went completely around the issue with that destiny thing. Whatever, you'll tell me when you're good and ready I suppose. "

The solar priestess just shook her head. Her friend had no idea how far from the truth she really was.

'It's just as well' She suspected, figuring that when she actually was ready to tell her dear friend all about this grand destiny of hers it would most likely be too late.

A few silent minutes passed by before Makoto checked her watch.

"Jesus girl, what brings you to my bedside at this 'ungodly' hour? My goodness I can't even remember a time I could get you up this early. Well, not without a fog horn and a tall glass of ice anyway." She grinned devilishly at the memory as Himeko tried in vain to suppress a shutter.

The blonde shook her head again, this time hoping to banish the rather vivid flashback of the time her friend spoke of. Sometimes she seriously wanted to question her injured roommates so called 'sense of humor'.

"I just…wanted to check in on you is all. It's been a while."

"Aw, you came all this way because you were missing little ol' me. Poor thing, I hope you know it's only been a couple of days." Makoto put on her baby voice and laughed as her friend rolled her eyes.

She knew Himeko was lying through her teeth. Well, maybe not all of it was a lie but she was pretty sure that wasn't the only reason she was here. She decided let it slide. For now. If Himeko didn't want to talk about what she'd been through, Makoto wasn't going to push the issue.

"Well as you can see I'm still as pathetic as I was the last time you saw me. Not much has changed. The doctors tell me there might be a chance at a full recover. A lot of rest is needed and whatnot. And who knows, I might be back on the race track in no time."

"That's wonderful Makoto!" Himeko exclaimed, it was probably the best news she's heard all week.

"Yeah yeah, hooha's all around. What I want to know is how you've been doing. Surely there's something you want to tell me or are you just going leaving me hanging here?" The injured track star motioned for her friend to hand her the glass of water on the nightstand.

Himeko handed it to her while thinking of something to say.

"Well…we have a test in science that I should be studying for."

"Bah, that's not what I mean. I want to know important things. Non-school related things. Like what you do now that our dorm is practically off limits? Where do you go in your free time? Which reminds me!" Makoto stopped before taking a sip of her water and shifted around as best as she could, insuring she could stare her blonde friend straight in the eye.

"A little birdie told me that somebody has taken up living in a certain Himemiya mansion under the invitation of a certain blue haired princess of Ototachibana Academy. Hm, I wonder who that is. Do you know Himeko?" She grinned.

Himeko blushed a little and looked away; a certain sadness crept back into her eyes.

This took Makoto completely off guard. She expected her friend to be overjoyed at the mere mention of her current living arrangements. Is it possible that staying at the Himemiya mansion was somehow the cause of Himeko's odd mood swings? The injured athlete couldn't imagine Chikane doing anything that would upset her friend like this. But then again, she's been wrong before.

What Makoto was thinking apparently was written on her face, for her rather depressed looking friend perked up immediately in the rich girl's defense.

"Uh-it's not that bad. It's wonderful actually. A bit big and overwhelming at times but um…Ms. Himemiya been doing her best to make sure I'm comfortable."

The brunette had the feeling something was missing from that statement but when Himeko didn't speak again she choose to ignore it. Maybe she was looking into things too much.

"Well that's nice. I guess. Not a lot of details to go on but I'll take your word on it."

"Sorry, it's just…hard to describe."

The injured track star huffed. "And here I was all excited that I had an inside source that could let me in on all that's grand and glorious that is the Himemiya family. I guess they're just like normal people huh?"

Himeko shrugged. "Can't say for sure. I haven't met Ms. Himemiya parents yet. They do have a lot of maids though."

One maid in particular came to mind. The ruffled blonde couldn't shake the feeling that the head maid held a considerable amount of distain towards her. She couldn't image what she did to the other woman to provoke her in such a way. Maybe she should try to make it up to her later.

Makoto's scoff brought her out of her thoughts and back to the conversation at hand.

"I imagine they do. With that big of a house I'm surprised no one's gotten lost yet. Or have they?" She gave Himeko a catty grin.

"Only once or twice." The blonde informed her shamefully, her cheeks a bit flushed.

Truth be told, she now refused to do any exploring what so ever in that house unless Chikane was with her. The last time she got lost simply after trying to find a bathroom, which she found eventually, but seemed to have forgotten which way she came. About an hour later, her lovely blue haired princess turned into her knight in shining armor when she caught her just as she was about to fall after she climbed up and attempted to open the curtain in the room she wondered into ( thinking perhaps a look outside could help her get her bearings back). Himeko still doesn't know how the girl got there at the exactly moment she needed her most but she was too grateful to ponder on it for too long. She was also too distracted, thinking about how good it felt with Chikane's arms around her.

The blonde was later informed that she somehow managed to end up on the exact opposite side of the mansion from where their bedrooms were located. Chikane suggested that perhaps they should have one of the maids make a map or that she should just keep the blue haired heiress around at all time so Himeko wouldn't get lost again. Although the blue eyed beauty said it jokingly, Himeko still would have picked the second over the former any day.

Makoto's laughter drew her roommate's attention once more. She's been daydream a lot lately.

"Well that figures. So other than that, anything interesting or life changing happened without me there?"

Himeko's bleak silence over took the room. Crap, Makoto forgot there was certain something she didn't want to talk about.

Surprisingly enough, the younger girl's silence didn't last as long as she thought it would.

"Well, I uh…did go on a date with Souma yesterday…if you think that's interesting."

The clumsy blonde jumped up in surprise as Makoto spit the water she just so happen to be drinking at that moment across the room and began to choke.

After a few minutes of pounding her chest and Himeko repeatedly asking if she was sure she shouldn't go get a nurse, the injured brunette recovered, a bit worse for wear but still.

"You did what?" was the only thing she could get out of her mouth.

This was a completely unexpected development for her. Never would she had guess in a million years that the prince of their high school have a thing for shy little Himeko. Although that would explain why he would continually shoot down any other girls that's came looking for a date but still. She only wished she could have seen Himeko's face when he asked her out (and she knew he was the one who did the asking. Her friend just couldn't pull off something like that.) she must have had a heart attack from all that blood rushing to her face.

The thought was amusing but not as much as it would have been.

"When did this happen? I thought you didn't care for Souma… in that way." She managed to get out when she was done gawking.

Himeko looked down sadly. "I…didn't think I did either. We went on a few dates and he was so nice and…and I….it didn't work out."

Makoto frowned. "Don't tell me he broke up with you yesterday."

Her friend just shook her head.

The injured brunette was at a loss. If that wasn't it, then what could have possible caused...

Suddenly a dark thought shadowed her mind. As unthinkable as it was, the possibility was too great to ignore.

She asked through clenched teeth. "Himeko... he didn't...do anything...I mean, he didn't touch you...Son Of A Bitch that's it! Get me a wheelchair! I'm going to find that boy and beat him within an inch of his life with my crutches! I said get me a wheelchair! Screw it. I'll get the nurse myself."

Himeko stopped Makoto's hands before they could reach the call button.

"NO! ...I mean, no. Nothing like that happened. I promise."

Her injured friend didn't look so convinced. "You swear on the death of your favorite bow?"

She rolled her eyes. "Yes, I swear on the death of my favorite bow."

After a brief, yet intense staring contest, Makoto ever so hesitantly pulled her hand away from the call button and back to its formal resting place.

"Now Makoto, you know as well as I do that Souma would never do something like that. Never in a million years."

The athlete took a deep breath. "I know." She almost sounded disappointed.

It didn't go unnoticed.

"Then why would you even bring it up if you knew it wasn't true?"

"Well…you never know. You think you know a person and then…" She trailed off. "Oh come on! Look at this room. I've been coped up in here for how long? It was bound to bury its way into my psyche sooner or later. I'm surprised I even recognized you when you came in. It's cabin fever, you hear me? Cabin fever! We're lucky I haven't lost all of my marbles by now."

A serious moment passed between them before they both broke off into laughter, even if it was less then heartfelt on Himeko's part.

"Though seriously. I'm going to go crazy here. The T.V.'s busted and I swear the walls will close in on me at any minute. Tell me there's hope. Tell me our room is intact enough that our stuff survived. I could really use my MP3 right now."

The ruffled blonde shrugged. "I'm not sure. I haven't been to the dorms since I moved in with Chik- Ms. Himemiya. It could have survived but I can't promise you anything." Himeko looked around the room. "Besides, it doesn't seem that bad in here."

Makoto grabbed her friend's collar and pulled her until their faces were only a few threatening inches apart.

"Listen to me Himeko Kurusugawa, and listen to me well. I'm stuck in this room 24/7 with only the birds to keep my company. Birds Himeko! You know how I feel about birds!"

The blonde nodded cautiously and carefully removed Makoto's hand from her collar the best she could without provoking her. "I get it." She said softly, as if talking to a wounded animal.

"Do you?"

"Yes. I'm sure of it. Alright I'll go see if anything survived but I won't have time to make it back before school starts. I'll come back and visit you as soon as it let's out. MP3 or not."

Makoto sighed. "Yeah go ahead. School's important. Besides I've lasted this long, it would be a shame if these next 8 hours turned out to be the straw that broke the camel's back. Maybe we should have safety word just in case I go over the edge?"

Himeko giggled. "I don't think it works that way."

"You're probably right. Anyway, you should check by the computer, or at least where the computer was. It was the last place I remember seeing it. I think I had just finished syncing some Blue October songs on it when we were attacked."

"What?"

Makoto blinked in confusion. "Oh, sorry. It's an American band this chick on-line suggested I listen too. I think she's an American too or at least from some place that speaks English. Can't understand a word they say but it has a great beat to it. You should listen to them sometime."

The blonde shook her head. "You and your foreign bands. Isn't this the fourth one you've downloaded this month?"

"Sixth but who's counting?" She grinned.

Himeko's watch began to beep, signaling that she had to leave if she wanted to make it to school on time. They said their farewells and Makoto reminded her again to hurry back after class, rambling something about the birds taunting her as they watched eerily throughout the day. The blonde shook her head again as she left, making her bump into the nurse as she walked in. Apologizing, she slipped away and rushed out to the bus stop as fast as the hospital staff would allow.

Back in Makoto's room the nurse addressed her patients. " I'm here to inform you that your usual nurse called in sick today, so I'll be taking care of you."

Makoto couldn't help but smile. 'Looks like today's going to be good day after all.'

A/N: That's all I have for now and if it's confusing, that's okay. It'll make more since as the story progresses. Next chapter, Himeko begins to explain what happened on her date with Souma, or what ended it. X3


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: AlrightY then! Sorry for the delay. I had stuff to deal with and blah blah blah excuses excuses. Anyway, down to the chase. Here's the next installment of my fic and prepare your self for some good old fashion Teenage angst. I mean, what KnM fic doesn't have at least some angst in it? Luckily there's not much after this but keep your tissue box handy. I almost cried while I was typing this but then again I've been emotional lately. Either way, just in case. So grab those hankies and Away we go! (EDIT 8/3/10: This chapter has been proofed)

In destiny's hand

(KnM)

Chapter 2

Himeko walked silently down the long winding path to Ototachibana Academy. The early morning sun shined pleasantly over the scenery and lit up the freshly dewed grass like diamonds on display, each glistening drop twinkled with their own personal rainbow. After last night's rain it was truly a sight to behold.

The birds seemed to share the same sentiments for they sang they praises to the morning sky and bathed playfully in the remaining puddles. The gentle breeze picked up the refreshing scent of wet pine and flowers as they reopened to release their pollen to the newly damp soil. It was a picture perfect morning that would make even Disney envious of it's beauty.

The normally happy girl inhaled the relaxing fragrant but was unable to take comfort from it. She couldn't find comfort in any of it.

Last night's events still buzzed around in her mind like angry hornets and destroyed any joy that threaten to lighten her mood. Though her visit with Makoto brought a smile to her face, it unfortunately didn't last.

Ignoring it wasn't an option. She tried at least a hundred times before but to no avail. It plagued her like a batch of grotesque weeds that no matter how many times she pulled them up, the roots kept breaking off in the soil to re-grow again.

Last night was supposed to be care-free and enjoyable; a time to forget her troubles and the world-pending burden that was thrust-ed onto them. At least, that's how Chikane voiced it.

Oh, her wonderful Chikane. She didn't know it at the time but ever since Himeko told her about Souma's date, she had been waiting breathlessly for any sign that Chikane didn't approve, didn't want her to go. That's all she really needed; an excuse. Just one good reason to go outside and tell Souma she couldn't go.

Sure it would break her heart to watch her childhood friend feel the cold stab of rejection but it broke her heart even more to watch Chikane prance around as they picked out clothes for her to wear, giving tips on where they should go. All while holding that perfect smile…and avoiding eye contact.

Looking back on it, Himeko could just smack herself right now for not putting two and two together. She should have thought more on it. Then again she could have never possible suspected such a thing. Not without knowing what she did now.

She remembered it, down to a T, the exact moment her life was turned inside out and everything became so clear, like she had been watching life though a foggy windshield, just now to find the switch for the windshield wipers.

She felt so ….bleak…. hopeless.

It wasn't supposed to end that way. It just…wasn't.

The rain. It started with the rain. Himeko and Souma were walking down a vacant path, talking about nothing in particular. Then it began to rain and they were forced to find shelter. It started out harmless enough, just polite conversation, a little accident while she wrung out her clothes, and oh yes, the ever eventful Orochi attack. This seemed to be a reoccurring thing when she was with Souma.

As usual, push came to shove and soon they were fighting for their lives. Three against one wasn't very fair but then again, she might have been more worried if the battle lasted longer than ten minutes. Souma must have been training a lot lately. He was defeating those goons faster and faster each time. Not to mention destroying more and more each time, but hey, all battles had their collateral damages, right?

Soon the clouds dispersed and their view of the sunset was breath-taking. The battle was over and won, Himeko wasn't sure how she would ever repay him. Before she knew it, he was leaning in to give her a kiss. She wasn't sure what to think of it but he was so nice to her all the time, and it would be a shame if she couldn't give him something in return. It seemed harmless enough.

Closing her eyes, she waited and felt the soft pressure to press against her lips. And then it hit her. Hit her like a bolt of searing hot lightening that ripped through her body and battered it's way into her mind! The center of her chest throbbed and began to burn as if something was trying to jump out of her skin, her pulsing heart. She didn't even have enough time to gasp as the air caught in her lungs and forced her into silence.

Her head pounded as image after image ravaged their way into her conscious. There were so many of them, cluttering in her mind, each bring in a sense of familiarity and déjà vu but leaving before she could grasp what it was.

The voices! Oh my god, the voices, several of them, each one different but so similar at the same time. They cried to her, outraged at her, screaming betrayal! Betrayal of the only one she had ever truly loved, all in one innocently ignorant act.

She didn't understand. It was suffocating her. What was going on?

Then it came to her; exactly what she asked for, the images, the memories. She could see it so clearly, as if it was just yesterday. She could feel the gentle tug of the breeze against her robes, the innocent scent of meadow flowers, the sound of their care-free laughter as it echoed through the shine. Yes, there they were. Chikane and herself and yet…they weren't. They were someone else, in a different time.

They were the Solar and Lunar priestesses. They knew of nothing else, it was who they were. They were raised together, lived with each other, loved each other. Wars spread and battles were fought but they stayed together, fought side by side until that fateful day. Duty was their master and they were the only ones to answer it's merciless call. With mournful good-byes, it was ended with cold remorseless steel as it purged it's way through her body. Himeko felt it, as if it was happening right then and there. The gut wrenching sharpens as it tore through flesh and blood, the heated pooling as her life drained away and left her numb; unfeeling of the arms that wrapped around her. That one last fading image that would surely haunt her; the Lunar priestess, Chikane, cradling her, speaking softly, her lips moving but she couldn't make out the words. Her eyes, those beautiful blue eyes, filled with tears as devastation and love battled for supremacy. And then finally, that last kiss as it was lost forever on her lips as her breath ceased.

The knowledge shocked her to very core. She could feel it now. It hummed through her like a living thing; a surging comfort. There was no mistaking it. As if a veil had been lifted, she knew without a doubt that she was in love with Chikane. Always has been and probably always will be. Himeko wondered how she could have ever thought it was anything else. And even worse, she was going to be the one that killed her, as she had many times before.

It brought a whole new wave of agony that ripped through every sense of her being for what felt like an eternity but in reality, this didn't last longer than a few seconds.

Souma didn't even noticed until a strange light ignited between them and he pulled away from her stiffen form.

"Himeko? Did you see that?"

Whatever force that held her in such torment released her then. Air rushed out of her lungs as hot tears streamed down her face.

"Himeko? Are you alright? Oh god, I'm so sorry. I should have asked for permission or waited and-"

"Souma." Her voice didn't sound like her own. She hardly recognized it. It sounded so …empty, lost. "I think…we just made a mistake."

He didn't understand but he dare not ask. Himeko looked like a simple breeze would shatter her to bits at any given moment.

Her lips quivered as she spoke. "I need to get out of here. I need to think."

He nodded and got them back on safe ground. He began to follow her back to the mansion but Himeko stopped him.

"I need to think alone Souma, please." Her hands shook as she pushed him away.

She didn't even wait for his answer as she turned and stormed away. Thankfully, he did as she asked and let her be.

It was quite a ways back to the mansion but she didn't care. Even as it began to rain again and her clothes clung to her soaked frame, she couldn't bring herself to care about anything.

Her body felt so numb, her brain fought to catch up. It didn't make sense, this couldn't be real. A lie! It had to be!

Chikane would never, EVER do such a thing. Not in a million years. She was her friend, her comrade, her closest consort, her…her lover.

Her thoughts screeched to a halt! No, she couldn't think about that right now. She wouldn't make it through the night if she did.

Her troubled mind seemed to reflect the weather as it poured down, a relentless chaotic dance that drenched every surface. She approached the gate that coveted the winding road that led to the Himemiya's estate. Once a beckoning light of comfort and hope, now a reminder of a reality she couldn't face. Not yet anyway.

Taking a shape turn, She fled straight into the dense forest that guarded the estate. She rushed through the relentless trees, attempting to out run her agonizing thoughts, branches scrapping limbs as she dashed by. She didn't feel them. She couldn't feel anything over her burning lungs as they wheezed for air.

An overturned log stopped her reckless retreat. Her body crashed into the ground with enough force to knock out the little remaining air she had left in her lung.

Breathless and grief-stricken, Himeko curled up among the leaves and cried.

She cried for solace. Cried for Chikane. Cried for all the forgotten memories and tragic endings. Cried for all pain the Orochi ever caused them, in this life and the ones before and surely the ones that would follow. But most of all, she cried for the love that was given to them only to be ripped away and shattered into piece before their eyes.

She cried until her tears ran dry and her emotional storm cease, leaving her in an abyss of emptiness. Hallowed out, she stumped to gain her footing and rested against a tree as the tumbling rain-washed away the mud that clung desperately to her dress.

After sometime, Himeko wasn't sure when, she had found the drive to make her way back through the forest. Her limbs seemed to taken on a life of their own. Leading themselves through the forest without much thought.

The Himemiya's homestead was warm and welcoming. If Himeko was in a more receptive state, she might have taken comfort in it from the rain. The maids' greetings fell on deaf ears as she made her way numbly through the house.

On some level, Himeko was aware of Chikane's presence and concern when the drenched blonde walked by without so much as a single word, almost as if she didn't even acknowledge the lunar priestess's existent.

In the confines of her room, Himeko flopped lifelessly onto her bed, staring unfocused at the ceiling. Even in her emotionless state, her heart jumped as Chikane gently knocked on the door, speaking softly.

"Miss Kurusugawa? Are you alright?"

Himeko didn't answer.

"….Miss Kurusugawa? Can I come in?"

" Go away."

There was a pause before she heard shuffling outside, Chikane had pressed herself closer against the door, but made no move to open it.

"Himeko?"

"Just leave me alone. I just want to sleep. I'll talk to you in the morning."

Chikane's silence pulled at her heart.

"…if that's what you wish."

And with that,she left, if possible making Himeko feel even more empty.

Whether they would actually talk in the morning or not, she didn't know. All she knew was that she couldn't handle this right now. She didn't want to deal with it. She never wanted to deal with it. She'd rather go back to not knowing anything at all!

Himeko paused...No. No she didn't. She couldn't lie to herself like that. She wanted to know this. She would never want to go back to not knowing how she felt or how the lunar priestess felt about her. Those memories were dear to her and just as precious as the ones she shared with Chikane now.

They loved…had loved each other so dearly. Just remembering such a feeling …was enough for her….for now anyway. What she would do when it wasn't, she didn't know.

Himeko didn't sleep at all that night. Not for the lack of trying. Every time she closed her eyes the sight of her last moments with Chikane 's past life flashed before her. She won't be asleep for more then a few minutes before she jerked awake, clutching the invisible wound she swore was there. She shuttered at the fading reminiscent of steel soldering flesh only to find nothing was there. It was just a dream.

In the early hours of the morning, before the sun ever rose, Himeko gave up on any attempts of sleep.

Wanting to get away from anything and everything that even resembled her destiny as a Priestess of any kind, she went to see the only person she knew that had nothing to do with it. Her dear injured friend Makoto.

And so, leading her to where she is now.

Near the gate she found Chikane, waiting. Most likely for her but Himeko wouldn't allow herself to admit it, though it was clearly obvious. The solar priestess was surprised. With the Himemiya's limo nowhere in sight, the young heiress must have been standing out here for a while, shockingly without any members of her fan club swarming her. Himeko couldn't help but wondered how she ever accomplished that. Seeing her arrival, the heiress went to approach her but stop, leaving several feet between them.

Unlike herself, Chikane looked as she always did. Proper, well groomed, her face pleasant but unreadable; though this time her chin was held slightly higher.

To everyone else she may appear normal but to Himeko, she looked like a woman who tried ever so patiently to wait for her punishment with dignity.

She flinched at the thought. Punishment? Was that was this was? She supposed through Chikane's point of view it would seem like it.

Himeko inwardly shook her head. She didn't deserve that. For all she knew, Chikane didn't remember a thing that happened before this life and she sure as hell wasn't going to bring it up. Just in case. Even if she did remember, the solar priestess just didn't have the heart to do something like that. Chikane was just…just a friend, who cared and tried her best to see her happy….like friends do.

The very thought made her heart ache. A longing older then herself rooted itself there but she refused to act on it. God knows what Chikane would think if she did. Especially with no memory of their past lives...of all the things they've done, she's done. Even in the end of it all. What a dark thought.

It wasn't the lunar priestess's fault anyway. It needed to be done and they were just the unfortunate few that were helpless to fight fate's course. What's done was done and there was nothing they could do to stop it.

Yes, it was fate who had did this to them. If not, then the Orochi was surely the one to blame but not Chikane. No, never her.

It was then that she knew what she needed to do. She needed to make things right, to make them okay again. even if Chikane was unaware of the real problem in the first place.

With her determination renewed, Himeko let a small smile form on her lips as she bowed, deeper than usual, and the clutching around her heart lighten a bit as she said. "Good morning Ms. Himemiya"

Chikane's perfect composure shattered as her face took a form of confusion yet her eyes sparkled with overflowing joy before slipping back under her pleasant unreadable mask.

This took only a matter of seconds, in which time no one would have notice the change was even there. No one but Himeko of course.

With a small smile of her own, the heiress bowed; a slight incline of the head, insuring eye contact between the two wasn't broken.

"Good day Ms. Kurusugawa."

A/N:Okay maybe I over exaggerated. Anyway, I actually watch the episode 7 again and realized Himeko and Souma weren't actually walking around. They were riding his mo-ped bike thing, whatever it was. Not that it matters. I hate that episode. Himeko is such a flippin' moron. That's going to change by the way. After this chapter she's going to go through something and is somehow going to make her less annoying. I can't tell you exactly what yet but if you're reading this expecting Himeko to be a sweet little idiot like she is in the series, you might as well drop this story now. I'm not going to make her totally OOC but seriously...what use is she like that? Can someone just warn me if I'm making her a little too extreme? I promise I'll Explain myself later.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Man, I feel guilty. It's been too long since I've updated. Oh well, here we go.

In destiny's hand

A KnM fic

Chapter 3

Chikane couldn't help but sigh inwardly as her blonde obsession walked pass her to get to class. Himeko apparently had nothing else to say to her, regrettable. But in some ways she was grateful for it. Chikane wasn't sure if she should bring up what happened last night. The whole thing left her very distraught, yet despite this she was unwilling to risk any...unpleasantries between them.

Shaking her head, the heiress turned to follow Himeko at a safe distance. Just in case.

Surprisingly, the court yard was damn near empty when she first arrived. A most shocking event indeed. The front of the academy had always been over-crowded with students, so naturally she briefly pondered if class had been canceled without them being notified. Her question was soon answered by a vaguely remembered classmate of her's that just so happened to arrive soon after she did.

"Good day. Are you on your way to watch the match as well?"

Apparently class wasn't canceled. "Good day to you too. A match you say? I'm afraid I haven't the slightest clue what you're referring to. Care to enlighten me?"

The girl gave a giggle that reminded Chikane of a child who just received a cookie for good behavior. This was annoyingly common among her classmates when she openly acknowledged them.

"Well I'm told that Souma Ohgami plans on whipping the new first classmen on the tennis team into shape by challenging them to a series of matches before homeroom starts. It sounds like a blast to watch."

_'Ah. That explains it. Finally the boy has his uses.'_ Chikane scoffed to herself.

Of course with such an occasion the tennis courts would by packed with students eagerly watching their so called "Prince" knock some greenhorns off their pedestals, leaving the front entrance resembling that of a ghost town. It couldn't have been more barren if someone dropped a bomb on it. Regardless the situation fit her agenda impeccable well. She planned to speak to Himeko as soon as possible, with a crowd of people watching or not. She wasn't sure if she could handle wasting the day away worrying over their friendship until **hopefully** they met up to have lunch together as always in the rose garden.

This was a much more opportune moment. There would be no interruptions and no having to explain to anyone why she chose to speak with Himeko or what it was even about. It was almost perfect. Only one thing needed to be put into place.

Chikane flashed a well practiced and certainly unfelt apologetic smile. "I'll have to take your word for it. I'm afraid I'll have to miss it. It's a bit embarrassing but I've seemed to have failed to pack one of my textbooks this morning and since I have not the time to get it myself, I'm forced to wait for someone to deliver it for me."

The girl's mouth all but dropped open in shock. "Oh! I see. That's a shame."

The heiress inwardly grinned to herself as the girl took the bait. Now to reel her in.

"It is but I'm sure I can make it up to him during our scheduled practice match after school today. We were hoping for a small crowd if possible this time around. You wouldn't mind not telling many people about it, would you?"

It was clear the girl was doomed before she even replied. "OH! Of course ! My lips are sealed. And don't worry I won't tell a soul about this morning either! I didn't even see you on my way in."

Hook, line, and sinker. It was almost too easy. Chikane gave a small gesture and waved her classmate off as she skipped gullible away. It was almost frightening how easily she could fool those around her, even with such a small thing. What she said about the scheduled match had been true and she was almost certain that girl couldn't keep her mouth shut if her life depended on it. Especially with such hot gossip.

So hot in fact, it would seem quite anti-climatic to even mention her whereabouts as of this morning, ensuring some privacy for her chat with Himeko. What sealed the deal, she was sure, was the girl's naive loyalty. After all, god forbid if the Himemiya's princess does anything that could possibility ruin her _perfect_ reputation and look almost human.

Of course this did mean she was going to spend her afternoon with a bunch of raging self proclaimed fans with only a tennis racket and a chain-linked fence between them and her but something had to give she supposed. A few quick private moments with Himeko was well worth it after all.

Ohgami will just have to learn how to tune them out as she so often did, unless he wished to be beaten by her again quite possibility in front of the whole school. Not that she would mind or anything. Besting him at anything seemed to bring her a_ not-so-healthy_ amount of satisfaction.

Speaking of _that boy_. She supposed in some way she owed him some kind of thank you for creating such a distraction for her (rather he knew it or not).

She all but rolled her eyes at the very idea. The whole situation with that brown haired annoyance had been setting off warning bells in her head ever since Himeko came home to tell her about her reunion with her long lost childhood friend and their "_date_". Her eyes narrowed slightly.

She should have strangled that twit after she found out he was an Orochi head. The only reason she didn't was because the head Priest, Kazuki swore on his life that Souma was on their side and would do anything to protect them...that and she couldn't stand the sight of the tears Himeko would surely weep over that underprivileged...Oh who was she trying to kid? Himeko had been the one and only reason that boy was still breathing.

Protest them? Ha! She knew well enough that he's sole priority was to their golden-haired goddess. For that she couldn't blame him but he had done a fair amount of other things she could easily hold against him. He certainly did have a habit of putting Himeko in even more danger then absolutely necessary. That enough was unforgivable. She didn't know what was more dangerous, his ego or that damn mech. Both at the same time seemed deadly enough to reduce anyone's property value to zero. The home-owner's association was in ruins as they know it.

Jokes aside, you'd think someone would notice a 3-story walking suit of destruction even if it had a habit of coming and going out of thin air and yet Chikane couldn't recall a single article of news remotely mentioning it. That was something worth pondering, given Souma's inconsequential battle strategy.

Honestly, would it kill him to even try to think out a course of action before summoning that giant tin can and blowing everything to hell and back? Seriously, those things could easily squash you like a bug before they even noticed they stepped on you. How long before Himeko retains some serious injury thanks to that boy's carelessness? Surely a fist fight would do instead of that over-glorified pissing battle that seemed to take place every single time him and Himeko where in the same vicinity AND….

Chikane hauled her train of thought and began to count backwards from ten...

Make that Twenty.

If she continued at the rate she was going, she was sure her thoughts would begin to leave a bitter expression on her face. Causing more trouble than it was worth.

However, as much as she wanted to believe they would be better off without him, Chikane knew her chances of defeating those rejected power ranger villains, were little to none in those steel contraptions. And nothing in the world could have prepared her for how degradingly worthless accepting that fact made her feel.

It didn't matter though. As long as Himeko was safe she would endure anything. Even playing it nice with the bane of her existence if just for a chance that her blonde goddess would grace her with a smile, with her presence.

Which led to her next thought.

_'As long as she's happy I...will respect her decision on whoever she chooses to be with. Even...even if it isn't me.'_

The thought held to her heart like a massive weight trying to pull her down where she may never get up again but her resolve didn't budge an inch. If anything it had strengthened it.

_'There you have it.'_ She prepped herself. _'For now on I will be her friend. A true friend. Nothing will get in the way of our friendship. Not even my own petty desires.'_

And with that, she set forth to lock her very homoerotic feelings for her secret love away in a place where she hopes one day will be forgotten and die a silent unnoticed death. She was a Himemiya after all. If she had been taught anything in life it was that with enough passion and perseverance, she could accomplish anything.

Or so she thought, as she just realized that her eyes had drifted to the very end of Himeko's skirt where it greeted those smooth creamy legs and where those darling luscious hips moved such a way that it raised her skirt just so that you could almost make out the line of her-

_'STOP IT!'_ Chikane pulled her thoughts to a screeching halt. 'Bad Himemiya, bad!'

The heiress took a deep cleansing breath and counted backward from ten.

It was possible that this was going to be much, MUCH harder than she first imagined.

A/N: Isn't that always the way? As soon as one character starts to embrace their feelings the other one tries to lock them away. Boo. Bad cliche. Don't worry. These ladies will get together. One way or another. This Chapter was originally much longer but I decided y'all have waited long enough for it so I cut it in half so I could work on the rest of it later. It also means the next chapter will be out much sooner. I promise you won't have to wait another year for it.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: What is this? I wrote a chapter with an actual plot to it not just emotional rants? Who know I had it in me? ;)

In destiny's hand

A KnM fic

chapter 4

Amazingly, for the first time that Himeko could remember, she was early to class. She always wondered if it would be any different than the normal bustling as the students rushed for their desks and then the attentive silence as they waited for their teacher. There wasn't much difference though. Her classmates just stood around in their social groups and chatted the morning away until surely the first bell would signal the beginning of their day. It was a bit disappointing. Not that Himeko was expecting anything magical, she just expected...a little bit more. Since Makoto was out of commission and she blow off Chikane this morning she really had no one to talk to.

Rethinking her last statement she couldn't believe that was the case. Normally she would spend as much of her morning as possible with the blue eyed beauty. They even went as far as telling the heiress's driver to go as slow as legally possible and sometimes to take a few detours so they would make it to school "just in the nick of time."

Seeing as this morning went differently, she really had nothing to do. Himeko found herself scanning over the room as if something entertaining would just pop right out at her. It was rather unlikely but it was better than nothing. Out of the corner of her eye she saw one of her classmate catch a spit ball right between the eyes. She frowned as a few on-looker laughed at the unsuspecting victim, who surprisingly took it very well. He merely laughed and flicked it off his face before telling them to go screw themselves, playfully of course, as he pushed his headset on and turned up the volume to where even Himeko could hear it. She felt sorry for the boy's poor ears.

His actions did give her an idea though. Almost ironically, she happened to find Makoto's Mp3 when she stopped by their rather damaged dorms. Lucky for her their dorm mother took the liberty to pick through the wreckage for anything she could salvage for her girls. Not surprisingly, their computer was destroyed down to its very last chip, to the point that Himeko would doubt that even the priestess' powers could bring it back. Thankfully not all the things around it share the same fate.

True, the Mp3 had seen better days. Its screen was creaked and Himeko had to replace one of the batteries but it still worked. She had been curious as to what was on it as well, so she imagined that curiosity had got the better of her. Digging through her bag, she pulled out the sorely abused device and switched it on. After shuffling around for a few minutes, the blonde paused at a song she didn't quite understand. The words sounded slow and slurred, their T's were sharp and they rolled R's. It was almost like they were speaking though their noses and yet they managed to sing at a delightfully low octave. She couldn't understand a word of it but regardless it sounded pretty good to her. The impulsive beat made you want to bob your head and perhaps wiggle a little hip, then the interestingly placed classical instruments would chime in. A couple of violin strings here, some piano keys there gave it a good civilized feeling to it,... she guessed. She was sure that wasn't the right way to describe it but she didn't know of any other way to put it. Chikane might know though.

Now it didn't take a genius to figure out this had to be one of those foreign bands Makoto was talking about, even Himeko came to that conclusion. Flipping the device over, she attempted to read the title on the display screen. Almost as expected, she couldn't. It looked like curvy gibberish to her. The title must have been in the same language the song was in. The blonde begin to ponder slightly on how Makoto could possible tell which song was which if she didn't know the title or even the words to it.

Her pondering slowed as a pressure began to form in the back of her head. Not exactly painful but not very comfortable either.

It was small at first, easily ignored but quicker than expected it began to grow.

Not only in intensity but in size too.

As it spread across the back of her head, stopping just behind the ears, Himiko's thought process stopped. The music she was listening to had began to sputter and haze over with static, almost like its batteries were close to dying but the full charge bar on the MP3 said otherwise. Perhaps it was broken?

It was a reason for concern until Himeko was unable to hear it altogether. In fact, she was unable to hear anything. Her classmates around her fell silent, though she could see their mouths still moving; no words came out.

The pressure moved to the front of her face, her sinuses began to pound, her tongue heavy. It felt like she was underwater, like she had swum too far down into the deep end.

Blurring, everything was blurring. First it was the things that moved, then everything else.

Shapes lost form.

Colors mingled into the other then canceled each other out.

Oh gods. What was going on?

Himeko tried to blink it away but when she opened her eyes again, she saw nothing.

Great heavens above! Had she gone blind!

She tried to say something, maybe call for help but nothing came out. Her throat tingled.

WHAT WAS GOING ON?

Himeko started to panic! What should she do? Should she stand up? Hopefully grab someone's attention?

But how would she tell them what's wrong? What if Chikane saw her like this? Oh great heavens, how would she see Chikane? What if she never saw Chikane again? Never heard her voice? Never able to enjoy her presence?

It was just too much for Himeko to imagine, much less deal with. She just wanted it to **stop**!

And then...it did.

Just like that the world came back to her. Her sight, her voice, her hearing, all there.

Himeko blink a couple of times then looked around. Everyone was as they were before. Talking to each other, playing around, enjoying their morning. No one seemed to notice that anything had happened. Anything at all.

In fact, Himeko herself began to wonder if anything **had** really happened. Was it a day dream? A figment of her imagination? A sudden spark of insanity?

Whatever it was, she didn't know. All she knew was that she prayed it would never happen again.

Waiting a moment or two, she settled back into her seat, cautiously blinking a few more time (just in case), and began to listen to her music again. Hoping it would calm her worn nerves.

Himeko switched back to start the song over, bopping her head a little to the familiar beat she heard just seconds ago before her..._episode_?

She refused to think any longer on it. Far too much had happened in such a short amount of time. It left her absolutely exhausted.

Driving head first into the music, submersing herself completely, wishing nothing more than to just get carried away. To not think or worry, or consider what her future might hold... or how ever long it would even lasts before...

She sighed, shaking her head free of the thought. This was going to be a long day.

_"Just listen to the music_" She told herself.

Zoning out, she let the song take her. Telling her stories of pain, stories of triumph. Stories of love. The words soothed her, spoke to her soul. Had her problems put on hold, just for a moment. And that moment she enjoyed thoroughly.

At least until it hit her.

It spoke to her...

The words...

She..._ could understand it_?

The song made perfect sense to her. Every verse, every word, she knew them. The translation was perfect, though she knew they weren't in her language.

She flipped the device over quickly. Maybe she switched it to a different song and didn't notice? A different song...with the exact same...beat. _Yeah,_ could totally be it.

The title was still in curvy letters but...they were no longer gibberish. She... knew what they meant, could read it, identify each character and... just knew.

Wait, what? That wasn't possible? How could that be? Maybe she was over thinking this? Maybe Makoto had the same song on here twice? Maybe one was in their language? That could be it...right?

"MS. KURUSGAWA!"

Himeko all but jumped out of her skin. Jumping up straight as a pin, she stood at her desk and voiced an apology without even knowing what she did wrong.

Sometime while she was pondering herself in circles, the bell rang without her even realizing it.

Her teacher, who happened into the room shortly after the bell, greeted her students as they stood at attention, all except one anyway.

"How nice of you to join up, Ms. Kurusgawa. Since you didn't respond to the first two times I called you I thought you had already checked out for lunch before class even began."

Himeko gulped down a knot forming in the back of her throat. Today was indeed going to be a very long day. It had just began and she had already used up all of her strikes.

a/N: well that's it for that chapter. I almost ended for different time but then I thought I'd add more since the updates take FOREVER. Yes, the suspense doesn't end here. Next chapter I promise there will be some answers. Himeko is going through a lot of changes that I imagine would come with having multiple lives. Especially when you start remembering them. Also Spoiler alert: Who's ready for some Himeko/Chikane action? I know I am. Got some coming up for ya...More or less.


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